I see you had another fight with the insomnia mons...

2011-09-17T09:26:41.248-05:00

I see you had another fight with the insomnia monster last night....but it appears, in your sleeplessness, you gained some rather important insights. For that I am happy and I am pleased that I might have played a small part in you actualizing that insight.

The element that underlies your realizations, as you pointed out, is love. Love for others, love for God, and love for self. We certainly have control over all of these, but as you aptly pointed out, we cannot control the love that others may or may not feel for or demonstrate to us, so we must accept that and make decisions based on that acceptance.

There was one passage in your post that I felt was rather profound;

"The sort of patience I am talking about is an ability to keep working on an interpersonal problem with someone I love even when it appears hopeless. I used to be proud of this trait but I have started to wonder if it would just be better if I started to work on a framework for better determining when it's time to throw in the towel."

I see this as the gist of your dilemma. And the answer to your question (should you build a logical framework for giving up) is clearly evident within this passage. I think we all need to build that framework, even though it may be a very painful thing to do. I have had some relationships that have caused me and the other person so much pain, that it was best to cut all ties and move on. Sad as that may sound, I believe that doing so has allowed me to better evoke my love of the other person, my love of God, and my love of self. When we are unhappy or disappointed in a relationship we are not giving the best of ourselves to the other person nor to ourselves, and therefore both of us ultimately end up unhappy and dissatisfied. And in this condition, certainly we are not able to give the best of ourselves to this world (God if you want to view it as such); that which we were intended to give during our presence here.

I have considered one of my most important tasks in this life(and most certainly my biggest challenge), was to figure out my purpose in this life and to fulfill that purpose as best I can. As I've aged I've learned more and more about this, but I'm still learning and at times it is a struggle.

Build that framework and keep it in your intellectual and emotional toolbox, because I agree, sometimes giving up is the best way to love.

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I see you had another fight with the insomnia mons...